


You're Trembling

by HazelNMae



Category: Peaky Blinders (TV)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-01
Updated: 2019-09-01
Packaged: 2020-10-05 01:19:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20480597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HazelNMae/pseuds/HazelNMae
Summary: Written for Anon on the prompt "You're trembling."





	You're Trembling

“Luca,” you whispered, trying to wake him. “Luca, wake up,” you said, a little louder.

The hardened gangster turned in your direction, his face softened as he realized it was you.

“You’re trembling,” you said, stroking his arm lovingly.

You’d been sharing a bed with Luca Changretta for close to a year, but you’d never seen him shaken. He had an air of confidence about him, a strength unparalleled, and you had been convinced he never experienced fear. But your arrival in London had exposed a side of him you’d never thought existed.

* * *

You’d surprised him. Had traveled by ocean liner, then train, then car, to get to him after an uncharacteristic phone call two months ago. 

He’d called for one of your scheduled discussions. He’d always been punctual and you’d always known he’d call you, on your office phone, exactly when he said he would.

But while this call was prompt, it wasn’t typical. 

Luca was nervous.

His voice trembled on the phone with you. “(Y/N), these Shelbys,” he’d said. “They’re not to be underestimated.” 

“Luca,” you said, in a deep and slow voice you knew always calmed him, “then don’t underestimate them.”

He’d gone on to tell you how Tommy Shelby had forced him into a trap. How his aunt, Polly Gray, had flipped on him. And about his plans for a confrontation in Tommy’s “insignificant little distillery” where he made “undrinkable swill.”

After the phone call, you immediately went to the transit authority and booked passage out of the city. You told your secretary you were going on a business trip, but she’d been the one to transfer your call from Luca, so she already knew the truth. You packed your bags, and boarded the first leg of your trip that evening, sending a telegram ahead of you so Luca wouldn’t worry when he was unable to reach you for a few weeks. 

It was a long journey to England, and you spent the six weeks mostly alone with your own thoughts.

When you finally arrived, you’d made up your mind to say a few things to Luca. You’d come with the intention of helping him–providing him comfort. But you were now determined not to leave without some comfort of your own. You knew you’d never be allowed to marry the man you loved, but you could at least receive some sort of commitment from him. You were traveling halfway around the globe to be with him, afterall–putting your life on hold to support his. The least he could do would be for once to tell you he loved you.

He was waiting at the docks for you, concern plastering his face where joy should have been. Instead of embracing you, he grabbed your violently by the shoulder and pulled you to his nearby car. 

“Luca, for fuck’s sake,” you said, “and here I thought you’d be happy to see me.”

He barely spoke to you that evening. It was so awkward you nearly booked a hotel to get away from the aggressive silence between you. 

But he asked you to stay the night with him and you’d never been able to resist him.

* * *

“You’re trembling.”

Luca just wiped a hand across his face as if he were trying to erase what remained of a bad dream. 

“Luca, I need you to be honest with me–with yourself. What is going on?” You finally asked.

“Isn’t it obvious? He said, eyes closed as if he were too ashamed to look at you. “I’m in love with you.”

You felt your heart racing, the sweat breaking out on your hands. It’s all you’d wanted to hear for so long, but it didn’t seem quite right in that moment.

“What? But–but you don’t even seem like you want me here.”

“That’s because I’m scared–for your safety. I told you these Shelbys were not to be underestimated,” he said, sitting up to finally look you in the eye. His dark blue irises pierced the walls you’d put up. He lifted a hand to stroke your cheek. “They know about you. About us.”

“At least someone does,” you said, dropping your gaze to the bed sheets. 

Luca didn’t respond. He knew what you meant. He was fully aware of how he hadn’t committed to you–hadn’t given you what you needed. It was hard for a man like him–so tough, so menacing, to show his emotions and let himself be vulnerable.

A single tear fell from your cheek and landed on his pajama bottoms. The salty liquid spreading out through the fibers as you watched.

“I can’t keep kissing strangers and pretending their you,” you whispered.

And with that admission, Luca pulled you into him for a kiss. While it wasn’t your first kiss with him, it was the most passionate–the most laced with something other than carnal need. It was warm and sensual. For the first time, you felt like Luca was kissing you with a purpose. And all the anxiety you’d felt about your relationship, began to melt away. 

You were in London. With him. And you weren’t going to leave his side until his business was settled. 


End file.
